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🤣 Art of the deal
by /u/Outrageous-Egg1760 | 104 comments | 2026-06-17T03:59:42+00:00 Central
Comments
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| /u/Working_Kangaroo3467 Fuck, that's just cold . I've already repeated it |
| /u/Sutoraizu Greenland usualy is cold. |
| /u/Pure_Restaurant_5897 And Coldland is usually green |
| /u/TheOneCalledEggs if greenland is cold and coldland is green then whats coldgreen |
| /u/kifflington What comes out when you blow your nose. |
| /u/mahreow Already repeated it? The fuck does that mean? |
| /u/Working_Kangaroo3467 It means I already told people the joke |
| /u/SuccessOn1 😂😂😂 top tier |
| /u/Cyralithorienne It's really is. The sad part is that it's barely even satire at this point. |
| /u/f-ingsteveglansberg This was the plot of the movie The Mouse That Roared. |
| /u/Sana-F16 It really is If you are not very smart sure. |
| /u/Mister-Erect Fuck invade Canada too, we could use the extra income. |
| /u/Dexchampion99 340 billion dollars is a lotta dough...but I live in a major city so...hrm...decisions. |
| /u/newwheels66 It's actually $300 billion in reparations. Plus unfreezing billions of their assets. Worst deal ever! |
| /u/Autronaut69420 Soooooo much WINNING!! 300 BIL of it |
| /u/Market_Foreign Just don't get too close to a young girls' school, you'll be fine |
| /u/GoldenMegaStaff That is only 1/3rd of an Elon; with inflation basically chump change. |
| /u/Chemical_Building612 Okay, what if the US gives Canada back Elon Musk and Canada gets to extract all assets and everything of value from him? |
| /u/MaybeExternal2392 Canada had Elon at one point? You guys really do keep sending us your worst. |
| /u/Chemical_Building612 Yes, Musk lived in Canada between South Africa and the US and was a Canadian citizen for 30+ years before becoming a US citizen. He also lied repeatedly in his US immigration process, and is therefor more of a legitimately a Canadian citizen than an American citizen. |
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| /u/thelubbershole Only if they take back Drake and Ted Cruz too |
| /u/rouge818 Closer to 1/4 now as of today |
| /u/Original-Rush139 Bro, I live in California because the weather is fantastic every day. What say we compromise and you do the invading, we surrender and then we split the Trump bucks. |
| /u/Adventurous-Map7959 Are you willing to sacrifice a girl's school, including the girls inside, to an initial tripple-tap? |
| /u/MaybeExternal2392 This is unamerican slander and pro Iran propaganda. America only double tapped the girls school and I won't have you defaming the president of peace for it. |
| /u/Adventurous-Map7959 I'm leaning towards you being sarcastic, in fact I'm 99.999% certain you are, but the American people are so stupid on average... Here's the source of my claim: According to Minab's mayor and the Iranian Ministry of Education, the school was triple tapped, being struck three times in total.[5] Satellite-base analysis by BBC Verify suggest the area of the school was hit with multiple missiles.[4] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2026_Minab_school_attack# Events |
| /u/MaybeExternal2392 Damn I thought I was clear with the president of peace double tapping a girls school thing, you really can't be to liberal with /s though. I was legitimately wrong about the triple tap though so thanks for the source. |
| /u/Mike_Kermin I mean the invade Canada guy is being sarcastic as well. No, the President should not invade Canada. Our lean here should be more of a horizontal planking maneuver. |
| /u/Dear_Chasey_La1n For 300 billion, let's make it 2. |
| /u/raverbashing Convince him to invade New Mexico thinking it's Mexico then do a deal with Mexico |
| /u/Crafter9977 🎶 blame Canada, blame Canada 🎶... |
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| /u/Mos-Wishes Venezuela called, they want some too. |
| /u/qatamat99 Nah they cashed out pretty quick. Didn't wait for daddy Trump to get bored of the war |
| /u/Bert-63 Fuck yeah... The entire rest of the world will be lining up. |
| /u/Frosty1397 Invade me daddy Trump (and pay me $300B at the end) Donnie is used to paying people after he finishes, if you know what im sayin |
| /u/katastrof He's also good at promising payment and flaking, but this is house money, so he dgaf. |
| /u/Nervous_Group8638 For 300 billions? Sorry wife, but I'd consider giving that turd my anal virginity (of course that's mostly an excuse to have him locked in a room alone, for "privacy", no other reason) |
| /u/MaxDisdain id do it for 3 million hell even 300k id consider it |
| /u/pluviophile079 Literally saw Reagan's presidency and said hold on, let me put on my father's robes. ((Yes, those robes)) |
| /u/Ja_Shi Depends who you ask. Pretty sure the IRGC and China are rather happy with him 🤷♂️ |
| /u/The-Bangaloreal Don't give up.. I trust Americans to make him look like Albert Einstein with their future voted presidents |
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| /u/ghost_warlock worst potus ever...so far. I'm not sure how, but I'm sure the GOP will find a way |
| /u/CwazyCanuck Would Greenland really be willing to give up its nuclear ambitions? |
| /u/GilneanWarrior Is iran? Did we just fund their next nuclear expenditure? Assuming the 300 billion ends up going to Iran and not the Trump family. |
| /u/Johannes_Keppler Would you give up your nuclear ambitions with Israel in your back yard? I wouldn't. We've seen what they are capable of. Having 'the nucular' is what's keeping Russia untouchable and giving it up made Ukraine get in to the situation it is now. I don't like the proliferation of nuclear arms everywhere at all, but I do get it. |
| /u/obliviious I'm pretty sure Russia would still be a huge issue without Nukes tbh. They might be less than they were, but I wouldn't have high hopes for any land invasion |
| /u/slashS4sarcasm They aren't talking about an offensive into Russia. If Russia didn't have nukes, the US and rest of the west probably would have sent in troops and equipment immediately and directly to defend Ukraine, on Ukrainian soil. Instead the best they could do is invite Ukrainian soldiers to their own countries to train and then send them back to the front lines. It took forever for any country to finally send weapons and equipment. |
| /u/Kevlaars If we don't want Iran to have nukes, stop giving them reasons to think they need them. |
| /u/Oggie_Doggie Ukraine and now Iran have shown that there are two types of countries, invadable ones and nuclear ones. |
| /u/espkv From what i've seen this term, i'm guessing the 300 billions will be paid out in trumpcoins. |
| /u/Ferovore The past few decades of geopolitics has shown time and time again that your country does not have a right to self determination unless you have nukes. Hate nuclear proliferation, still think eventually it'll be the end of us, not gonna blame a single country for wanting them unless they're happy being bent over a barrel by countries with them. |
| /u/qatamat99 Well as long as the MoU doesn't include anything about Nuclear ambitions like the one Iran signed then Greenland can keep its spicy goo |
| /u/Cyralithorienne Getting invade by the US just to secure infinite tolling rights and a massive payout is honestly peak financial strategy. |
| /u/WhiteMilk_ No no no no no, not tolls. |
| /u/Any_Show_5160 I hope they call it a tariff, it's a beautiful word after all... |
| /u/ghost_warlock tolls with a service fee and processing fee. Rename it the Straight of Ticketmaster |
| /u/AdvancedPlayer17 Everyone laughing at US, losing to some middle eastern country like Iran. Guess both Russia and US are weaker than everyone thought. |
| /u/353452252 Hey everyone! America is handing out free money! Their citizens don't care enough to defend their own country so who's going to stop them |
| /u/jimi-ray-tesla just add question marks to that shitty suit |
| /u/Voodoocookie You just need to convince Bibi that your government can be toppled in a week at most. Then he'll convince Trump. |
| /u/GudduBhaiya-Mirzapur https://giphy.com/gifs/Mg0uaDNqG6TahT6okb |
| /u/Runkel80 Iran got Stormy Danieled |
| /u/annomandri Sorry they ran out of ammo. Hold tight while they replenish their stocks. And one of their B52 bombers ran out of air to fly in, unfortunately. |
| /u/Infinite_Plenty101 8 people died in that crash. That shit ain't funny you goon |
| /u/annomandri Your forces killed many innocent sailors of neutral countries who were working in shippin vessels in the last few months. Stop attacking other countries if you dont want to be spit on your face. you unclean Butt whole. |
| /u/TheOtterMonarch what if both sides are bad and all death is bad? |
| /u/annomandri Death is a fact of life. There can be no new life without death. Morals are black and white. Hurting another innocent person will have consequences. In this life or the next. |
| /u/Saros_Enjoyer Iran kinda sucks but the US is demonic |
| /u/TheOtterMonarch either way, 8 americans dying is still 8 human lives lost. im not saying they're worse than any other 8 deaths, but that's still 8 people whose loved ones will never see again |
| /u/PlusTiedye Every time an American "soldier" dies, its one less terrorist in the world. The American military is the biggest terrorist organization on Earth. |
| /u/MaddogBC Somebody snarkily replied elsewhere that they shouldn't make deals with terrorists. I was wondering if he meant Bibi or Shitler. |
| /u/Dommiiie And those deaths (and many many more) could have easily been prevented, if not for one senile rapist. |
| /u/GloomyIndividual3965 Those deaths were the result of a crash during a routine test/training mission over US soil, and had nothing to do with the war. I agree with you on everything else though. |
| /u/Personal-Rhubarb-884 Doesn't have anything to do with the war but it does have everything to do with our inept government. They're scrapping routine maintenance and training. We lost a lot of high ranking officers and the standard we held our military to is simply gone. This could have also been avoided if our Air Traffic Controllers had proper staffing and funding. |
| /u/GloomyIndividual3965 No disagreement here. I was just clarifying in case anyone thought that b52 was lost in the war. |
| /u/Mansplainer101 No. Unfortunately, millions voted for him and millions where too egocentric to bother to go and vote for the other alternative. |
| /u/Adventurous_Salt They did sign up for a career of bombing the needy, so who knows how it plays out in the wash. |
| /u/dan_santhems I think the stupid war Trump started that got them killed is worse than a joke |
| /u/Moppermonster It does require one to sacrifice a few schoolgirls on Trumps altar of blood though. Is that really worth it? |
| /u/juanjung 300 billion would make Greenland look like Shanghai. |
| /u/PlatypusIllustrious7 This was fake news circulating the internet. |
| /u/drkravens I don't think Greenland has that many kids to bomb. Also not funny. |
| /u/Anubis_Omega Can they invade my house ? They can block the Strait of my parking if they want. |
| /u/wtf1977 he is used to paying over the odds for fucking up |
| /u/Makere-b So get hit by couple missiles, some people dead, collect over 300 billions from Trump and an apology? |
| /u/Hoodedmastersin DonOLD dump gives out deals. The best deals. All at taxpayer expense, everyone says |
| /u/Pretend_Berry8070 Has anyone read or seen the documents? |
| /u/skulleyb This is the post if the year |
| /u/Praxic_Nova So we can give reparations. Hmm |
| /u/Posterapokalypse I heard they're already enriching uranium. |
| /u/Nobanpls08 what deal did iran get? |
| /u/MadRaymer Here's a draft of the deal according to Bloomberg. Takeways: at least $300 billion in reconstruction, releasing frozen Iranian assets, and lifting sanctions. Pretty sweet for Iran. |
| /u/Nobanpls08 Are they making any concessions in exchange? And is that 300b coming from my taxes? |
| /u/MadRaymer Are they making any concessions in exchange? Yes, the draft outlines those. And is that 300b coming from my taxes? A large portion of it likely will. Here's the text of that point in the draft: The United States undertakes, together with its regional partners, to create a comprehensive plan agreed upon by both parties for the rehabilitation and economic development of the Islamic Republic of Iran, While ensuring financing of at least $300 billion. The implementation mechanism of this plan, as part of the final agreement, will be formulated within 60 days. So some of those regional partners are likely to chip in a portion of that $300 billion. But US taxpayers aren't off the hook here. |
| /u/Saros_Enjoyer Opening and de-mining the Straight of Hormuz, giving up some of their nuclear material, allowing nuclear inspections, not building any nuclear weapons Basically the stuff the US already had with the JCPOA before Trump ripped it up like an idiot in his first term |
| /u/chrabeusz The funny thing: why would Iran need nuclear weapons if they won this without having any? |
| /u/Green-Rule-1292 closes the atlantic strait - Greenland |
| /u/Tramonto83 It's a fun joke but you have to account for 3000+ deaths, more than half of which are civilians, into the deal... |
| /u/PlatypusIllustrious7 Iran killed more people than that. |
| /u/Tramonto83 That's not the point, I'm in no way a fan of the Iranian regime. On the contrary. It was an observation: they get compensation because they suffered damage, both in lives and in things destroyed. That's not a thing to hope to happen to your country just because you get money in exchange. |